Q&A — The Kolbrin “Bible”

One in a continuing series of answers to questions from Apologetics.com readers …

Question: I recently came across something called The Kolbrin Bible. Can you tell me anything about this? Thank you, and God bless.

Answer: This is nothing (special) to worry about. It seems to be a weird glomming of Celtic spirituality, Egyptian spirituality, Arthurian legend, catastrophe cults (to coin a phrase?), comic books, and capitalism.

Summary: The Kolbrin Bible, and related books, while not technically a hoax — I wouldn’t be surprised to learn the people behind it believe their own web clippings — are a non-issue. It’s yet one more grab-bag o’ garbage that is designed to tickle our fancy bone, waste scads of time, all the while beckoning to us from the ash-can of history, and occasionally making bank deposits marked “gullible.”

Below, I’ll work from the “top down” — big concepts down to specific “Kolbrin” stuff.

Some general notes
* People for time immemorial have wanted something other than God

* We love to chase down anything — ANYTHING — that will keep us from facing him

* We spend our time on this or that “controversial” idea, or “interesting” approach, or “scary” monster

* Consequently we end up wasting our time, even as Christians, or wasting our time, and dying without God as non-believers.

[Mind you, I’m not saying you’re doing this; I’m noting the millennia of history we ALL have of doing this, and I’m (somewhat laughingly — since the behavior is literally absurd and frequently hilarious) warning us against it.]

Specifically about made-up “religious” junk —
* Often this wanting something other than God manifests in someone who is intelligent and motivated
* Then he finds lots of other people willing to part with their money because they, too, wish to avoid God
* That is to say, they loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil — John 3:19, see also John 12:43, where they love the darkness for money.
* Again — it has always been thus. It’s just that sometimes it gets applied to religion, and people start selling something. The motivated and intelligent guy can do it with any subject.
* I think it works particularly well with religion because our desire and need for God is so acute, so we’re more easily led into false promises of this or that newly revealed thingamabob.
* This religious exploitation of this particular weakness of man has produced, by fair guess, 80 or 90 percent of all cults, including ones that are mainstream now, such as the Latter Day Saints.

More specifically about this particular made up junk
The Kolbrin stuff is largely the work of a small group of people, possibly leading to one person, named Glenn Kimball, who claims to have “completed Ph.D. work” from … somewhere (this is not the same as having a Ph.D.). He is in Arizona, and runs a place called the Kimball College and the Institute for the Study of Ancient and Historical Manuscripts. Sounds cool, n’est-ce-pas? In one of those unfortunate-but-true situations, he’s probably a quack, though possibly a true-believing one.

Here are some links
Kimball College
Some debunking of the guy
Inconsistencies in the Kolbrin text

Click “contact” on the Kolbrin page to find a listing for a podunk town in California, and a corporate address in Henderson, Nevada. Henderson is a suburb of Las Vegas, and Nevada is a mecca for corporate filings, because they don’t require a serious presence by the company in the state. Basically the guy pays an attorney to maintain a PO Box that is the “corporate headquarters” of that company.

It’s not illegal, it’s just hinky. Your brother-in-law who wants to peddle his “great invention” and needs a corporate business structure for tax and other purposes could do the same thing.

Behind some of this folderol is
* An 18th century Welsh forger and
* The 19th century fascination with “Planet X

[By the way, Planet X has been featured in storylines of numerous comic books and bad TV, everything from Duck Dodgers (Disney’s Buck Rodgers spoof) to Star Trek to, appropriately enough, X-Men.]


I don’t know why, although I’m sure there are books and books on this, but the 1800s saw A HUGE interest in hokey spirituality. There was real Christian stuff going on, but with the Romantics in Germany and England and the Transcendentalists in the U.S., and the vast opportunity of the new-born United States, and economic booms and busts, and maybe something was in the water, that century just has a huge number of cults and other wingnut theories being propagated. Mormonism was born, as was Christian Science and a raft of other pseudo-Christian dealios, and guys made a lot of money off the gullible masses who (somewhere, truly, in their hearts, might) want God.

But they don’t really want God, or they’d get Him (Matthew 7:7ff). They want something that feels like they’re wanting God, but let’s them pretty much keep going the way they were.

Interestingly, this Kooky Kolbrin Klatch includes ancient texts, originally written on plates, saved from destruction and hidden away, found recently, known only to a few, and available for a low, low price.

Sound familiar? It’s the template for any dude who wants to make a buck off the idea of fake gods.

The Kolbrin folk fit this picture, but I made up the part about “low, low price” … it won’t be cheap.

(Really? This real stuff is hidden away? But I can buy it, you say? Oh, but the world is going to end in 2012? So what are you going to do with all that money when it does, and even if you survive, there is no monetary system to use it in?)

I’m sorry for taking even this much time to say all this, except you asked, and we aim to please, and maybe it will help.

My final word is don’t waste any more of YOUR time on it.
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